How to Beat the Dragon, Revelation Lesson 4

Okay, okay... I borrowed the above title from an excellent expository preaching session from Dr. Don Carson, whom in my estimation, is incisive, thorough and straight to the point. Right, let's look at the world and the church from God's perspective.

Chapter 12
Observation


Science fiction! Fantasy! You could be forgiven for wondering if the writer of Revelation had dunked himself in one anime episode too many. I mean, Woman clothed with the sun with the moon under her feet and crown of 12 stars? Either this guy is high in imagination or on LSD. However, since all Scripture is God-inspired (2 Tim 3:16), LSD is out. Which leaves the option of God-inspired Scripture via means of imagination, in a manner that is readily understood by the original reader.

Hmmmm...

The identity of the woman is revealed in v 17. She is the true church, a group of believers in the Old Testament (OT) and New Testament (NT) who have the characteristic of those in v 11 (those who overcome by the Blood of the Lamb, word of testimony and not clinging to their lives unto death).


Lets get back to the text. The woman is in birth pangs. She is about to give birth to a male child who will rule the world. Messiah will come from the community of faith, in OT it was Israel, in NT it is the church. A great red (murderous) dragon waits for the child to be born in order to devour the baby. The dragon is also the Devil, Satan, the accuser of the brethen (v9). The child was born and taken to God (in one sentence describes Jesus' birth, ministry and ascension). The woman then is pursued by the dragon and fled to the wilderness (symbolic for testing and trial time, according to Jewish customs). There the woman is nourished for 1,260 days.

Now.


1,260 days = 42 months = 3 and a half years = a time, and times, and half a time. They are all different expressions of the same thing.


In order to understand what this means to the original reader, let's go back in Jewish history. In 323 BC, Alexander the Great conquered most of the known world, from his hometown Macedonia till India. He died without an heir, and his vast empire was divided between his 4 generals. You can find an allusion to this in Dan 8:21-22. The divided kingdoms were Egypt, Syria, Greece and Thrace. Now, Israel was right in between Egypt (Ptolemic) and Syria (Seleuccid). Israel became a hotly-contested region between these two kingdoms. Finally the Seleuccids from the north managed to wrest control of Israel, and under its emperor, vanquished all forms of Jewish worship. It was a capital offence to observe the Sabbath, to worship at the temple and Jewish priests were killed, pigs' blood poured on the altars to desecrate it. It was a dark period in Jewish history.


In about 164 BC, an emissary of the Seleuccidian emperor was sent to kill the Jewish priest Mattahias, but Mattahias killed him instead. Thus, a revolution began against the Seleuccid oppressors under Mattahias' eldest son Judas. The revolution was called the War of the Maccabees. Judas "hammered" the Seleuccids for 3-and-a-half years, and finally he won. The temple in Jerusalem was again dedicated. The Jews, for the first time in 400 - 500 years, began to worship God in their own land again.


Conclusion #1

Now.


If you tell a Jewish audience "three-and-a-half years" during the time Revelation was written (1st century), they instinctively refer to the time when their there was a great struggle, the war of Macabees, before victory was gained. Does it mean the persecution period was literally 3-and-a-half years? No. That period of suffering lasted almost half a millenia! Thus, the phrase 3-and-a-half years is symbolic for a period of immense suffering and catastrophic struggle, before finally, there is victory in sight.


Conclusion #2


The dragon with great fury tirelessly pursued the woman. On 3 occasions it was mentioned that he attempted to destroy her, but each time God rescued her and took her to the wilderness (desert - time of testing) where she was nurtured for ahem... a time, times and half a time.

Question:
From God's word, the church seemed to be always in a position where she is persecuted by the dragon. How does this compare with the state of our churches today, in our homes or anywhere in the world? Does this characterise our lives in any way?


Conclusion #3

This passage gives us a clear way to overcome the dragon.


a) Blood of the Lamb. It is not by our might nor power nor ability... but ONLY by the blood of the Lamb. We have done / could do nothing to save ourselves.

b) Word of the saints' testimony. This is bearing witness to Christ and the truth through word, deed and thought.


c) They did not cling to their lives even unto death. The true saints denied themselves and carried their crosses daily.






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The Trumpets Sound, Revelation Lesson 3

Anyone who has been praying will attest to a time where they have wondered if their prayers really mattered. When will true justice and goodness be restored? It seems the more we pray, the worse things become. Sometimes we feel our prayers bouncing off the walls and ceiling, and often, we wonder if they'd even gotten airborne in the first place!


Revelation Chapter 8 gave the persecuted churches (and us!) some perspective.


Observation


This is the chapter that opens up the cycle of the trumpets. Please remember that the 7 trumpets is the same story as the 7 seals, told from a different perspective. Seven in all, the trumpets talk about the judgement befalling the earth. After the 7th Seal was opened, there was silence in heaven for about half and hour (symbolism for "a short time"). Then another angel appeared with a golden censer and stood at the altar. There was incense and prayers on the golden altar before the Throne of God. The incense, prayers and fire from God were thrown down on earth, resulting in thunders, lightning, etc.


Food for thought


The prayers of saints play a very important role in the judgement of God. What is the real masterpower behind our world, what are the deeper secrets of our destinies? The prayers of the saints and the fire of God. More powerful than any dark forces and mighty powers in the world, is the power of prayer set ablaze by the fire of God and cast upon the earth. (Torrance)


Chapters 8-11
Further Observation

Trumpet 1 - 1/3 of earth burnt up
Trumpet 2 - 1/3 of sea became blood
Trumpet 3 - 1/3 of of water became bitter wormwood
Trumpet 4 - 1/3 of light darkened

Trumpet 5 - Locusts torture men without God's seal
Trumpet 6 - 1/3 mankind killed by plagues; people don't repent

Interlude - witnessing church is persecuted and vindicated

Trumpet 7 - Mystery fulfilled, Kingdom come



We see that Trumpets 1-4 mirror the plagues of Egypt (Ex 7), which grew in intensity after each time Pharoah refused to relent to God. When Trumpet 5 sounded, the judgement grew more serious. From natural calamities, it has grown to spiritual oppression. Locusts (noted as demons here by some scholars) were released to torture those "who do not have the seal of God in their foreheads" (v 4). They were only allowed to torture humans for a symbolic "5 months" though, which is the length of the locusts' lifespan. During Trumpet 6, a third of mankind (not the majority, but a significant number) was killed. Despite this, the others still would not repent and turn to God.

The interlude talks about The Two Witnesses (the church by some scholars) who were witnessing and facing great persecution at this point. Many miracles were displayed and the Two Witnesses even got silenced and killed, before they were resurrected and went up to heaven in full view of their enemies. The people were terrified and gave glory to God

At the 7th Trumpet, we are back in heaven. The mystery of God is fulfilled (10:7) and God's Kingdom has come.


Food for thought!



Well, there is just too much in this cycle! Basically it is a landscape of judgements, beginning from the the "mildest" to the most severe, culminating in the arrival of the Kingdom. This is told from the perspective of the inhabitants of the earth. If you notice carefully, Chapter 11:9 has actually finished the entire story of Revelation, although not its details (which will be explored in subsequent chapters).

I want to bring your attention to a particular reference "but in the days when the seventh angel blows his trumpet, the mystery of God will be fulfilled, as He announced to his servants and prophets." (10:7). Compare this "mystery" with Ephesians Chapter 3 - the Gentiles sharing the promise of Christ through the gospel.

Question:
Is the mystery fulfilled? Or is it awaiting a future fulfillment?


One comment that popped up was "I am sure God will protect those whom He has sealed (9:4) from the oppression of the locusts". Well, if the New Testament is anything to go by, God will surely protect His own in and not necessarily from the days of evil. If He has purposed that we live in such times, so must we. And so we must be found faithful to the end, no matter what kind of evil may / have already arrived. Was this not how the apostles and saints of old endured and overcame? Was this not how our Lord and Master triumphed? Let us then, not be afraid of pain, suffering and the hardship that comes when we remain faithful and obedient to Christ.




Recommended Reading: The Heavenly Man, story of Brother Yun, co-written by Paul Hattaway





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The Cycle Begins - Revelation Lesson 2, Part 2

If you have ever been involved in a single camera film shoot, you won't be surprised when the actors repeat one scene over and over again. The first time round, the camera may be picking up just wideshots, the second time it is close ups of the actors' expressions; the 3rd time the director may be taking pickup shots. In short, every detail in the location has to be taped on camera, even if it did not seem significant then. This is to make sure that when the footages are edited, it has all the finesse of a polished piece of filmaking with all the nuances and different angles making up the same story.




Reading Revelation is the same. First we must wade through the text itself. In chapters 6 - 7, the actual drama unfolds. Three times throughout Revelation, visions are carefully structured in sets of seven (chapters 6-7, 8-11, 15-16). Just imagine that the camera is in one position in chapters 6-7, and it has taped one story, ie one cycle has completed. Then imagine that the camera shifts position in chapters 8-11, so that it will get a different angle of the same reality from another perspective. Same goes for chapters 15-16.

Clearer?

No? Do not worry. It is actually very simple. We read chapters 6-11 in cycles.

Cycle 1 - Chapters 4:1 - 8:1
Cycle 2 - Chapters 8:2 - 11:18

Each cycle tells the same story, but from a different perspective or angle. The rest of the structure in Revelation will follow this pattern of cycles. Note that this structure is help observe the text structure, not interpret it!

Good.

Chapter 6
Observations
This passage is famously known as the Four Apocalyptic Horsemen.

Horseman 1: White, rides out to conquer. he seems to be like Jesus. Widely held views think this is the AntiChrist, or a spirit of conquest or delusion (false prophets and doctrine). His bow indicates he is a warrior, his crown indicates he is a ruler.

Horseman 2: Red, rides out with war and violence. Men slaughtering each other, peace taken away from the earth

Horseman 3: Black, rides out with economic adversity. Note that prices of staples (wheat, barley) has become extremely high, famine.

Horseman 4: Pale, riding out with death. Violence, hunger, pestilence and killings by wild animals.




Question: Do you think the horsemen appears chronologically, one after another? Or?


The 4 horsemen were represented by 4 seals. In the 5th seal, we see martyrs crying out to God asking for revenge. God gave them white robes and told them to relax while waiting for their complete number to fill up. There will be more martyrs coming soon.

Food for thought: Martyrs absorb the tension of the colliding worlds between that of Christ and non-Christ's. The church is caught in the crunch of this collision. Her role is to absorb this suffering, so that others may have a shot a redemption too.



When the sixth seal was opened, it describes the Day of the Lord. A cosmic meltdown as God takes His hands off creation. As God holds the universe together in His hands, it is unimaginable when He takes it off! This will not just be climate calamities, tornados, tsunami and earthquakes... this will be nothing creation has ever witnessed... nature melting away. People will run helter skelter to the caves hoping the rocks will fall on them, rather than face the wrath of God. Who is able to stand???


Chapter 7
Observations
Good news! God tells us who will be able to stand on that terrible Day (or time). Four angels holding back the full wrath of God, with instructions not to damage anything until the servants of God had been marked! Note the 12 tribes of marked people here are not the original 12 sons of Israel.

Question: Do you think the 12 tribes mentioned here signify a "physical Israel"?


Food for thought: Those who had put their trust in Christ will / may be required to go through tribulation, but they are never under the wrath of God. Tribulation (suffering and death) is clearly a part of what the church was enduring and yet to endure. God's wrath, on the other hand, is His judgement poured out upon those who had afflicted God's people. It is very clear from Revelation that God's people will not endure God's wrath when it is poured out on their enemies, but equally clear that they will indeed suffer at the hands of their enemies. This distinction is in keeping with the New Testament spirit.




Chapter 8
Observation
If you had watched "Pirates of the Carribean 3" or "Ironman" recently, you will find out there is a scene at the end of the credit roll. This scene sets the stage for the sequel that is coming soon.

Chapter 8 is that extra scene at the end of the story. It sets the stage for the next cycle - the 7 Trumpets. It is like a "table of contents" at the beginning of a book that pre-emps the reader what to expect before he proceeds to read.

More shall be discussed as we enter the cycle of the 7 Trumpets.


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Revelation Lesson 2, Part 1 - The Cycle Begins

When we come to chapters 4 till 8 of the book, we begin to see a grand landscape of breathtaking visions. It is also a new section in the book which reveals the terrifying events that will occur in the future. This is the main section of the Apocalypse.


Observation
Chapter 4 describes the Throne Room in majestic splendour, where all creation, represented (4:7) by the lion (mightiest of all wild animals), the ox (representing all tame animals), human (mightiest of all creation) and the eagle (mightiest of all birds). Correspond this with Ezekiel 10. They all fall down and cry "Holy, holy holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come."




It must be noted that although the church is told that God reigns in majestic splendour, His Son is depicted as the Lamb that was slain. Jesus triumphed through his obedience and death, so this is how his followers are expected to triumph as well (12:11). The Lion is a Lamb who redeems humankind through His suffering.


Observations
If Chapter 4 describes the atmosphere in the Throne Room, then Chapter 5 brings us to the matter at hand. There is a scroll. On the scroll was 7 seals. This scroll is an authoritative and important document which contains the judgements and redemption as seen in later chapters. In short, the scroll contains God's eternal plan for the universe.

Now, the scroll cannot be read until all its seven seals are opened. Since the scroll contained the judgements and redemption (refer para above), it may also be the scroll that was sealed in Daniel 12:4. And also an allusion to the scroll the Lord handed Ezekiel in Eze 2:9.

And in all creation, no one was found worthy to open the scroll. John wept. Then behold, the Lion and Slaughtered Lamb was identified as the Worthy Scroll-Opener, and a new song was being sung in heaven! The 24 elders and 4 creatures worshipped the Slaughtered Lamb, followed by myriad of myriads of angels, followed by every creature in creation. Progressive worship.




The handing over of the scroll from Father to Son shows that all authority has been given to Jesus. The prayer of the saints (believers) play an important role in the Lamb's opening of the scroll and the ensuing judgement (8:1-6) We shall see in the next chapter the content of the seals.



Food for thought: One comment that popped up was..."If this is what heaven's going to be like, it'll be a very boring place!". I think this sums up what a lot of people believe today, Christians and non-Christians alike. The modern view is that if we are going to wear crowns and long white robes playing harps all day, then we are better off with the attractions on earth, thank you very much. So we are "compelled to" choose the temporal pleasures over eternal joy.

Is this what you are struggling with? Like a good detective, I urge you to continue investigating God's word, because they not only have answers for those questions, but also a grander perspective that will change you.


......

Revelation Lesson 1

WARNING! If the Tribulation and Rapture is your main goal of studying this book, please do not proceed lest you be disappointed. Sorry, those are but minor themes, and you will not get what you are looking for.

Two things are required before we start on this often-misunderstood but utterly majestic book.
1. The Spirit of God to lead in all truth
2. A degree of humility as no one has all the answers

We will quickly go through the basics of Revelation, as these are stuff you can easily pick off the Net. They are:

Location where book was written - Patmos, a tiny island in Greece (map)
Date written - Approx AD95
Author - John the apostle
Purpose of Book - to encourage the saints undergoing persecution to have patient endurance to the end




Group Findings
Our group consists of Allan, Beatrice, Lai Peng and Jeremy. The exercise was to colour code the characters, locations and phrases that Jesus said. This inductive approach will help in our observation of the text.

CHAPTER 1:
Observations
1.Jesus personally appeared to the author, John. He commissioned John to write the letter (the book) to the seven churches in Asia - Ephesus, Smyrna, Pergamum, Thyatira, Sardis, Philadelphia, Laodicea.

2. John did not recognise Jesus. He last saw Jesus being taken up to heaven approx 60 years before. From history, we can deduce that since then, he had been witnessing for his Lord and encountered persecution. The rest of the apostles were all dead, martyred. John is about 90 years old, and exiled in tiny island Patmos because of the testimony of Jesus. John knew the churches he was writing to, he was sharing in their persecution (1:9).

3. The Jesus who appeared to John was different and unrecognisable. John was terrified and fell as though dead. Jesus appeared in a long white robe with golden sash across chest - garment of a Roman judge.

4. Jesus said "I am the the Beginning and End" twice.

Food for thought: For John, now an old man in his 90s, who has suffered persecution and loss of his friends the other apostles, persecution is nothing new. He has seen Jesus taken up to heaven while in his 30s, then the destruction of the temple of Jerusalem when he was approx 70. Then it was persecution all the way. As long as one was either a Christian or a Jew, persecution was to be expected. Nearing the twilight of his tumultous earthly life, John meets Jesus again after 60 years, and Jesus' words to him were: "I am the First and the Last"

Would I be able to recognise Jesus when He returns? Is He truly the "First and Last" to me?



CHAPTERS 2 & 3
Observations
1. Jesus is in the midst of the churches. He knows their works, strengths and weaknesses. To each church He appears in a different character - suitable for the situation in that particular church, ie, to Pergamum which had compromising doctrine, He appears as the One with a sharp two-edged sword.

2. To each church Jesus had a charge against them, except Smyrna (Persecuted church) and Philadelphia (Missionary church).

3. All the churches had individual promises if they repent. The promises also correspond to the situation the particular church was in...ie, to the spiritually dead church of Sardis, Jesus promised that if they overcome, He will not blot out their name from the book of life (2:5)... etc


Food for thought: Jesus is intimate with the churches, even though they are far from perfect. Group decision agrees that the churches represent congregations of all ages in all time, ie, it is not probable that Jesus meant the first church (Ephesus) to represent the first century / age church, and so on. The pattern of description here is parallel and not progressive.


This concludes the first part of the study, which is quite straightforward and literal in its approach. Next we will go to chapters 4 - 8, with its apocalyptic, cyclical pattern.


Recommended Reading: Revelation:The Triumph of Christ by John Stott

Revelation Introduction Lesson

As promised, here is the outline of an overview of the book of Revelation. Please take note that the purpose of our study is not to pin down a date, time, nor even a chronology of events to interpret the Last Days syndrome. So please, at the risk of courting controversy, I am asking you to please get this notion out of your heads before we even proceed.

Right. Now that we've straightened that out, let's sort out some foundational ideas.

1. Stop approaching Revelation with preconceived ideas. All of us, myself included, have a coloured view of the book whether we like it or not. While most of us will fall into any of the 4 major views of interpreting the book, we will try our best to be as unbiased as we can, as each view has its own strengths and weaknesses. Our approach will be inductive. We shall go through the 4 views, and each student will have to decide at the end of the book study, which view (or if there are others) that he / she intends to take.

2. There are plenty of details and icons from FantasyLand in the book of Revelation. Because they make good fodder for speculation and fire up the imagination, it is easy to get sucked into the details and lose sight of the Big Picture. Don't get mired in the maze. Always pull back and ask yourself... what is the book of Revelation about???

3. The main aim of the study is to get as close as possible to what the text meant to its original reader. That means, my friends, you have to step into the shoes of a persecuted Christian circa AD90 thereabouts.

4. That also means, although the main bulk of our study is from the book of Revelation, we also have to check out the external evidence, ie, historical records to gain a more accurate picture of what exactly went on and why the author made all those bizarre and symbolic references.

In order to navigate through the apocalyptic visions of the book, let us first understand how to read it like its original reader.

Revelation is a very special book because it contains a mix of the different genres of literature found in the Bible. As we all know, the Bible contains 66 books written by different people from different backgrounds and eras, over a time frame of a couple thousand years. What binds it together is that it is authored by the Holy Spirit (2 Tim 3:16). And therefore, if we look closely enough, it will have an underlining recurring theme. However, the Bible contains literature of different genres - historical narratives (Genesis, Exodus, etc), Prophetic (Daniel, Ezekiel), Wisdom (Psalms, Ecclesiastes) and Epistles (Paul's letters), just to name a few. (Think action flicks, romantic sitcoms, fantasy adventure, horror where movies are concerned).

Again, Revelation is very special coz it has narratives, prophetic/ apocalyptic, epistles and wisdom genres all crammed into one book. *Gasp* In order to wade through all that muck (to quote a friend), we will have to understand the different ways each kind of genre is meant to be understood.

I find the most helpful way of understanding Revelation is always zooming out to the Big Picture of the book. Look at an overview of the book... if you get lost / confused (and it will happen), do not despair... tweak the lens of your mind to the widest possible, and look at the entire book's overview again, in order to find your bearings.

Next, we will detect where the different genres of literature are located throughout the book. With this as a structural indicator, we can hopefully avoid the pitfall of getting lost in the descriptions and imagery which border on the weird and kooky. We will also explore the authorship of the book, its purpose and intention. Stay tuned.

Recommended Reading: How to read the Bible for all its worth, by Gordon D.Fee & Douglas Stuart

Month of Fat

I love August.

Lots of good things happen in the eight month of the Gregorian calendar. The weather is mild, peak season is over, it is summer in most places, it is the Malaysian national day... and it happens to be the time of my annual month-long feeding frenzy!!!!!!!!

Heh heh heh heh... the eating spree officially started yesterday at Chilli's in Bangsar. Kian Leong, Su Fong, Lai Peng and I had a blast... we are all kinda nutty to start with anyways. The food was great, the company was excellent and of course, there was plenty of laughter around the table... we had a great time!

Already the bookings are piling up. Weekends are the most popular. Thanks to my move to Wangsa Maju, the only time my friends can meet me is over the weekend. So that means I 'll be working on shedding off some weekend fat. But.. who cares? Heap on the fats!!! Oh yeaaaaah.

Like a Baby

How does a weaning baby feel?

Don't know. Too distant a memory. I had been reading up all the baby weaning and teething issues I can get my hands on, thanks to some advertorials I am writing. To my surprise, there are plenty to learn. For instance, if baby holds her head up and starts to smack her lips and click her tongue, you know she's interested in what you have in your hand. Or when she grabs your finger and chews, chew, chews. Or when she drools enough to fill a swimming pool.

Enough said, teething can be very distressing for baby as the teeth pushes out from the gums and produces pressure. Many remedies are available - teething rings, teething rusks, teething gels, cold apple wedges... but none I suspect is as effective as the cuddles, hugs and the huge arms of a loving mom to soothe away all the pain.

Psalm 131 is short. At only three verses, this passage looks like a filler of some sort (compare it to the humongous Psalm 119). Just as fillers are full of dense material (ask your friendly dentist or the collagen expert), Psalm 131 is simple, yet it fills you up nicely, if you get what it means.

Along with Psalms 122, 124 and 133, Psalm 131 is part of a medley of four songs. In particular, it is a song of simple trust sung by David.

The part that grabs me is verse 2. It says "Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul, Like a weaned child with his mother, Like a weaned child is my soul within me."

OK, in all truth, I don't think David remembered what it felt like to be a weaned child when he wrote this song. But he must have felt a comfort and contentedness beyond all he could describe, and there were no words to explain it - just like a gurgling baby who can't speak of the wonders of the mother's love but can undoubtedly feel it!

Parenting experts say that it is a good practice to let baby explore and have a variety of tastes and sensations in their tongue - so they will not grow up to be fussy eaters. This applies to when the baby is teething too, and when he is uncomfortable, irritable and when mealtimes can be an adventure! The mother will gently and patiently persuade baby to accept what is being fed. Even if it takes weeks. A wise mom would not give only sweet stuff to baby, no matter how the baby longs for it!

And for us, why should life be only confined to sweet things? Don't the bitter, sour, spicy, uncomfortable, unlikeable stuff also contribute to our own good if it is fed from a Loving Hand?

A weaning baby who trusts the hand that feeds her will accept and smile while she swallows. A child who simply trusts in the Almighty is so firmly anchored in hope that he can sleep like a baby in the midst of life's storms and difficulties.


Lord my heart is not haughty, nor my eyes lofty
Neither do I concern myself with great matters
Nor with things too profound for me

Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul
Like a weaned child with his mother
Like a weaned child is my soul within me

Oh Israel, hope in the Lord
From this time forth and forever

Dull Food

Ever waited at a restaurant known for good food... only to be disappointed? I know that feeling. My family went to New Paris in SS2 recently, a neighbourhood restaurant known for its delicious food and reasonable prices. We eagerly anticipated the arrival of the Captain's reccomendations - steamed grouper, marmite ribs, fried veggies, tofu with minced pork and bittergourd braised chicken.

The dishes arrived looking like they had been precooked and microwaved. My dad immediately pointed out the telltale signs - cold plates and there was no smoke emanating from the dishes! We finished the food, but could definitely say that the experience had been a tepid affair. Wonder how the cook would have felt if we have made a complaint. But we were just too polite and continued swallowing.

Today, more than others, I felt that the students in the bible class were swallowing too. I do not know if they understood what had been taught. It started with them all being anticipative at the beginning (they even took notes during a little icebreaker word game!) However, I felt the lesson nosedived for some reason. Just one of those days... and I really felt like a chef who has let the diners down. That despite the preparation and prayers throughout the week, the hours spent thinking about it, not to mention the sleepless night caused by it!

Such is human evaluation.

I m glad God just expects me to be faithful and not a super-skilled chef all the time.

Really Scoring

This particular tune has been ringing in my head for the past two days. In fact, it would spring on me so unexpectedly that I would start humming without realising it. Like the vocals kinda launched spiraling into auto cruise.

Of course I am referring to the catchy, adrenalin-filled John Williams' rendition of Indiana Jones' theme song. Has there ever been a tune so filled with adventure, anticipation, humour and promise?

My first real memory of the Indy trilogy was the Temple of Doom. The car chases with Short Round at the wheel, the sexy Capshaw singing on stage... "la la la la... Anything goes!" and the gory scene where the evil priest (Mola Ram?) reached his hand into a human sacrifice and pulled out a beating, pumping heart (ugh).

That was the first time I heard of an Indian goddess named Kali, the first time I flirted with the idea of becoming an archeologist, and to cut it short, the first time I saw a hero who was so close to home - beaten, bruised, flawed... and yet still a hero nonetheless.

It was a time where everything was possible... if you can only imagine it. I watched the movie nine times on the old VHS tape... and lost count how many re-runs it had seen in the ensuing years. By then, I was ready to digest Raiders of the Lost Ark and despite the latter being a better-made film, Temple has always held a special position in my heart. One year later, I was dressed to the nines and off to tea dances (at 4pm on Saturdays!) Friends had these cheesy autograph books where there was a list of favourite things one had to disclose. Everyone's favourite movie included Indiana Jones and Return of the Jedi or Grease II. It was Lucas' decade, soon to be Spielberg's.

So, after almost 20 years, Williams' score still tugs at the emo strings. At least for this former wannabe archeologist. OK, so I didn't find an exotic tribe and stop a cult sacrifice... but I sure did have some pretty awesome adventures in my own right, thanks to the hero who grew up with me, and taught me "So what? Everyone gets beaten one time or another."

Good to have you back, Uncle Jones!

Taking Heart

Blessed are the undefiled in the way,
Who walk in the law of the Lord!
Blessed are those who keep His testimonies,
Who seek Him with the whole heart!
Psalm 119:1,2 NKJV



Whole heart? "Whole"? OK, for the sake of splitting hairs, the New International Version and New American Standard say "all your heart". The King James is a stickler for the terms whole, complete, entire.

To be honest, who knows what goes on inside the human heart? Other than it being deceitful amongst all things, the seat of affections and the compass that veers a person throughout life? Many things keep the heart running, so to speak - joys, fears, ambition, hopes, dreams, disappointments, anger, etc. And to sum it... a person is the sum of all there is in his heart...

It is so easy to thank God when things are going well, when things are looking good study or career-wise, when family is showing each other love and consideration, when you have plenty left over in your bank account. When your kids make choices that bring joy and glow to your being. When despite hardship and suffering, you see value in your investment.

It is not so easy to be grateful when all those things are non-existent and you cannot see even half a step ahead of you. It is definitely not fun to be lost, destitute, purposeless, or worse... wandering in the wasteland of hope deferred. If anything could exact the cruelty of a slow execution, this has gotta be it. A gradual chipping away of the soul leaving a vacant shell of a body in its wake. Talk about the Living Dead.

Anyways.

The Psalmist said those who enjoy blessing are those who had given God their entire heart, warts and all. Like... he wasn't talking about sifting through the heart's contents and presenting only the choice parts, you know... keep the ugly bits under wraps since they are slimy muck (as if God could not handle such things). He said to give God the whole, entire, complete heart. No holds barred. Who would not shudder at the thought of being totally naked before God, stripped to the core, vulnerable, raw and defenceless?

No wonder we put up all kinds of fronts - rebellion, ignorance, triviality, apathy, or worse, a religious veneer to gloss over the obvious shortfall. I had been guilty of those things, although not in that order. All this in vain hope that God will pass by my weaknesses and let me be.

And God, being God, would not allow the defect to fester. Really, it is soooo hard to give God the entire heart. And unlock those hidden little chambers which hold on to their sordid little desires and secrets. Secrets too precious to be given away. But the blessed soul knows. Knows that no matter how deep the fear of violation, the freedom that ensues is more than enough to cover, restore and renew.

Perhaps too much has been said about the Six-Inch Journey from the head to the heart. Time to put some feet into those words and chalk up more mileage on the proverbial longest trip for man.

One Tragedy Less Would be Good

"How long have we been brothers?" Zilong (Andy Lau), the title character in the movie Three Kingdoms :Resurrection of the Dragon, asked his sworn brother Ping-An (Sammo Hung). "Thirty-two years and four months" was the reply. That was more than half of Zilong's lifetime. Albeit being one of the legendary 5 generals of the formidable Shu Kingdom in ancient China, Zilong was not mentioned in the Romance of the Three Kingdoms. That aside, the film was true to its literary depiction of the Shu Kingdom as the protagonist.

The film began and ended with Zilong and Ping-An, chronicling their fateful first encounter to the battleground where one met his valiant end while the other assumed greatness by proxy. Their lives, though panned out differently, had one thing in common - both had come full circle and ended up where they started. They spent the better half of their lives fighting for a cause, only to find very little reason to do so at the end.

Such are tragedies made of.

I had some hard thinking to do too. After spending 6 years living for a cause, have I come full circle? All that I wanted was to have a family growing and maturing in the ways of God. Maybe I was too hopeful. Or maybe I had heaped too much expectations on myself and on them. Maybe I had played God too many a time. Maybe I need to release them all to Him and move on with life. Maybe.

Ecclesiates tell us that life is meaningless apart from God. Do I need to plunge the depths of futility to understand what that means? Or... maybe I can simply fear and love God, obey His commandments... and set out like a junior Augustine... do whatever I like?

Don't know. But the world certainly don't need another tragedy.

Ramblings

March went by in a daze. It was election month. And for a while, everything else took a backseat whilst conversations went on furiously in coffee shops, kopitiams, mamaks, boardrooms, bedrooms... you name it. Who wagered which party was going to win, stories of corruption (old tales... yawn), cronyism and all the rest of it. Election fever was on!

Even the bible studies took similar slant. It was by no accident either that we were going through chapters 19 and 20 of Exodus, which spoke about the preamble and the formalization of the constitution for Israel.

Many parallels were drawn, allusions alluded, mental gymnastics exercised finally dare I say, tho we were not altogether wiser about the state of politics in Malaysia, we at least learnt that God's covenant with Israel all those centuries ago has ramifications for us today.

I love history for the way it progressively unfolds human nature. I just hate the idea of it being a subject for examinations. Love the relational factor, hate the rigidity of the structure that attempts to contain it.

Just as well, because beneath the rules and regulations and laws - meant to govern behaviour - isn't the ideal to live a life so exemplary that laws are no longer needed? But...ah, I am in fantasyland.

I digress.

Tomorrow we wrap up our 3-week analysis on the 4th Commandment, The Sabbath. After tracing its origin in Genesis, we looked at its institution in Exodus as a commandment, its part in the moral and ceremonial practices in the Old Testament, the controversy it sparked when Jesus interpreted it for the pharisees... and finally, its significance for New Testament christians. Phew!

And like those coming-of-age movies, the class discovered that the quest for one thing can open up doors of understanding to a bigger picture, beyond what was initially expected. What the students expected was a neatly-packaged doctrine, nicely presented in a "do this but don't do that" label (a product); but what they got instead was a process of thinking, re-thinking, interpreting and re-interpreting (an education, hopefully).

I must admit that I have learnt much too, thanks to these students, without whom I would not force myself to think a few steps ahead. The preparation for the studies have benefited me greatly. Tiring, but worth it.

Too Many Eggs

A couple years ago, a health shop opened on the row of shops across the street from my house. It was an instant hit with the residents, especially since they were dishing out freebies every few hours after their organised health talks were over. If you had ever been a victim of these sales gimmicks, you would know that it was really a cheap way of ensuring a crowd. The topics ranged from age-defying tactics to relationship boosting methods, peddled by young, enegetic speakers duking it out with very loud background music!

My dad was a frequent visitor to the talks. One day he came back from the shop and announced, "Everyone quickly! Get to the shop now coz they are giving out a carton of fresh eggs to everyone who attends!" Needless to say, every breathing soul in the house - my parents, the maid, myself and even my then 5-year old niece - darted across the street to secure our seats.

We spent 30minutes listening to a sales pitch. Then returned home with enough eggs to last us for months, since we don't usually eat a lot of them to start with. We realised we've created a storage problem. The eggs will go bad before we can finish them. In our greed and haste, we failed to see the consequences of our actions. We just hoarded. My memory gets fuzzy at this point, but I think we gave most of our eggs away, and even had to beg some people to receive them!

Sadly, in that sense we were not that different from the infamous children of Israel who grumbled, moaned and complained in the desert; as described in Exodus Chapter 16.
And when God miraculously provided food from heaven, the first thing they did (despite specific instructions to the contrary from God) was to - you've guessed it - hoard!

Sure, the need to acquire and possess more helps assuage the fear of insecurity. Who doesn't want some measure of security... savings, property, investments.... ? All these are good stuff, given by God. However, the unhealthy emphasis on good stuff can often distort our perspective of the true value of things. And life. Especially when it edges into our priorities unnoticed.

The Israelites' greed revealed a blatant failure to trust the God who had rescued and provided for them all these while. Either they thought God was unable, or unwilling to. My eggs incident may seem miniscule compared to the problems of the Israelites, but they are certainly in the same basket! The familiar ugly traits of unbelief, over-indulgence and reluctance to live in daily dependance are all evident, being thrown into the mix for good measure.



Too many things, God, compete for our love and trust in You. Help la... help us understand that submission to Your will should always take priority over our immediate needs. It was a lesson to the Israelites, let it be a less severe lesson for us.

Just Another Breakfast...?

Expect the unexpected.

Such a well-worn phrase. Happens to be the story of my life too.

This morning I woke up early and went to the wet market. Then, as I sat down to have breakfast, I ran into an acquaintance whom I had not seen in 13 years. We recognised each other instantly, but for the life of me, I could not recall her name. She sat down at my table and both of us simmered in pretend mode - each trying to out-wait the other asking for identification.

Our conversation centered around small talk - her family, my family, who's doing what, where, etc etc. Then somehow the dialogue veered towards the gap years between 1997 - 2001 and I inadvertently shared my testimony.

She sat and listened, her eyes welling up with tears as I recounted how my parents came to the Lord. She appeared visibly moved and was wiping her eyes. Just before going our separate ways, we exchanged numbers (and names!). Whether we would keep in touch remains to be seen, but this incident really reminded me of one thing I keep putting off - I have to get going on writing the memoir... and preferably before I become senile too.

Sigh.

Retreat Journal 5

Day 5 (Dec 31)

9.00am - wokeup & breakfast

9.30am - reading

11.00m - cleanup

11.30am - talk to Crys

1.00pm - Lunch

Things are winding down on the last day of my self-imposed retreat. All things unchanged, I have reached a decision. I am not going to Colorado Springs. I gotta write to tell the missions organisation that they can stop talking to their lawyers and accountants, stop working on the work permit, and stop making queries to the US immigration and Malaysian US Consulate. And they can keep the company car too. In a way I feel bad I have to tell them this - what a damper on all the buildup over the past few weeks.

But I believe it is the right decision.

CONCLUSION
The basis of the decision did not hinge upon the cost of going, where the funds would come from, whether my health could take it, how much I would be "missed" by family and friends, or any personal cost of such a move. I guess I am never much of a practical person when it comes to these details.

The sole basis of my decision is the belief that God has called me to study and teach His word. I am not called to any geographical location nor to any particular people. I am just called to be faithful in doing what I feel is of most importance right now. And despite being fortunate enough to have been gifted in several areas, I see the most valuable and critical contribution in studying, teaching and expounding doctrine of instruction to body of believers. It hasn't been so clear until now.

So I will stay and continue to freelance and also integrate witness and work. And trust a trustworthy God Who provided and continues to do so.

Retreat Journal 4

Day 4 (30 Dec)

7.45am - Wokeup

8.30am - Swimming

9.40am - Breakfast (leftover noodles from previous dinner)

10.15am - Leave for church

1.00pm thereabouts - Lunch

5.15pm - Returned from long lunch

6.20pm - Leave for dinner

8.00pm - Dinner

12.00am (31 Dec) - Returned from dinner


Today's sermon was about the making of vows. Actually I had no intention of going to church this week, but due to the outworking of circumstances, I found myself at the service. Back to making vows - the last vow I made with God was one of a bargaining nature. Out of desperation being stranded alone outside the Indira Ghandi airport in New Delhi in the thick of the 1996 winter, I struck a deal with God. I said if He would "save my entire family", I would go wherever He sends me.

One year later I left for the Doulos, and subsequently to a 2-year commitment with Operation Moilisation.

Two years after I made the vow, my parents and late maternal granny was saved within two weeks of each other. Granny wanted to be baptised immediately!


CONCLUSION
God definitely kept His end of the bargain, although it was me who had the gall / foolhardiness to approach Him dictating my own terms in my vow. He is Creator and yet He "layan-ed" (entertained) such ridiculous arrogance from a creature. I am just like a flower that is here today and gone tomorrow. The more I realise my insistent candour, the more I am grateful for His grace... one just needs to look at the children of Israel who perished in the desert to appreciate the longsuffering patience of God.

I think God would want me to make a decision that best reflects His character in Philippians 2:6 - 8. If I would allow God to crucify me without pity, He can raise me beyond measure (v 9). I pray He will make me lose taste / yearning for the things of this world; and long for the things of eternity. I pray to be kept sane / hidden until the day arrives. I pray that more than just doing His work on earth, I will grow to love Him more and more as the Worthy One.

Retreat Journal 3

Day 3 (29th Dec)

8.00am - wokeup

8.30am - trapped inside the condo unit because Crystal mistakenly took my set of keys

9.00am - started to worship on the piano

9.30am - Crystal returned and I went swimming

10.30am - Cooked pasta brunch

11.30am - Reading Tozer and NKJV

11.45am - Worship on piano

4.35pm - Finished worshipping on piano. 2nd attempt at reading...

6.10pm - Going for dinner at godbrother's house


I did not have any 'great revelation' today; I merely worshipped the Lord with my instrument. I have almost forgotten what a divine privilege this is. There was no constraint of time, of being watched... or anything else. It is just God and myself. He alone is great and worthy.

I had tried to read all afternoon, but somehow my mind got so distracted. I was just drawn to the piano. Once my fingers hit the keyboard, the rest was history. I didn't realise the passage of time until it was... 4.30pm! Aaaaaaaaaaarggggggggghhh!!!!!!!

CONCLUSION
Seeing the day not over yet, I will say it is still early to sum up. Initial thoughts - Apart from God nothing matters. Nothing, not fame, status, relationship, health, money, security in houses, cars, etc... not even civilisations or empires can stand the ravages of time. All will lapse in the light of eternity. One by one, we will slip into eternity and nothing... NOTHING that we have built or achieved will stand, apart from the stuff done in obedience to God.

Then... am I living in obedience? Am I being a true disciple? Are the things of the world losing their value in my esteem? If so, then do I have the inner peace and a calm rest that characterised the saints of God? Is my life one that is self-denying (at the parts that matter) and God-pleasing? Can God have His way in me? Will I allow Him to crucify me without pity so that he can raise me up without measure?

Ah.... life and its endless quest for the Almighty!

Retreat Journal 2

Retreat Day 2 (28th Dec)

8am - Wokeup

9am - Meditation

1pm - Lunch

3pm - 7pm - Last minute shopping for presents

7pm - Dinner

9pm - 10.30pm - Email and blogging


What makes a true disciple? The one who sees the Lamb who was slain (Rev 5:6) seated on the right hand of God, and will follow Him everywhere He goes.

Christ was crucified entirely - from head to toe. There is not one part of Him that did not go to cross. And He did it for me. For me. FOR ME.


CONCLUSION
If I can help it, I won't want to carry my cross. But Jesus requires it. It may not be the same magnitude as His cross, coz His burden for me is light and His yoke easy. I have it good. The path ahead may be fraught with dangers and suffering, and there is always fear at the door waiting to creep in to arrest the soul. Can't give in. Got to cling on to a trustworthy God Who says He cares and has overcome all that is necessary for my victory.

Retreat Journal 1

Why a retreat?

Reason #1: Need an answer on a decision, in particular - is God really calling me to CO Springs?
Reason #2: Need respite from people in my house
Reason #3: Need respite from year-end madness
reason #4: Need direction for life

Pre-Retreat Day (26th Dec 2007)
Returned from Christmas party the night before. Took the LRT to Asia Jaya from Wangsa Maju. Stoned and groggy from lack of sleep the last couple days. The last of Christmas activities is over... finally I can concentrate on the retreat.

4pm - Went out with May to Curve and 1U... chilling out.

10pm - Arrived at Crystal's and settled in.

11.30pm - Read John Piper's "Marks of a leader" and Point #9 on the grave responsibility of a bible teacher cut me like a razor-sharp stone. (Hmmm... could something be brewing here...?)




Retreat Day 1 (27th Dec)

Finished reading John Stott's "Calling Christian Leaders" and his exposition on 1 Cor 3:12 - 14. Here is what I understand: The foundation of the church is Christ. Then the building is built either with gold, silver, etc... or with hay, wood and straw. Gold and the like are likened to true doctrine taught; and the straw stuff is anything short of balanced theology and pure doctrine. Depending on what is taught, it will affect the church eternally - for good or otherwise.

Which brings me to these questions:

What am I building with?

What are my motives?



CONCLUSION:
God has called me to teach and be a steward of His holy Word. It is a weighty responsibility and I am held in serious accountability.